What to do when your ENTIRE identity is based around your trauma

Jade, ‘the girl with mental health problems.’

I’ve recently found out that my trauma has based my identity. I seem to be known as ‘the girl with mental health problems.’

Finding this out was a huge kick to the guts. I’m more than my mental illnesses. My whole reasoning for blogging about mental health is so that people realise it doesn’t define who you are as a person, but unfortunately my blog has done the complete opposite for myself.

It’s no secret that I’m very open and honest about what I’ve been through. I’m passionate about helping other people who may be going through similar struggles. It’s mainly because I never want someone to feel the way that I have felt in the past. I never want someone to feel the way I felt when I was balling my eyes out after taking a whole pack of pills.


What to do when people identify you as your mental illness

  1. Remember that everyone else’s opinion of you is IRRELEVANT.
    It can be so hard to remind yourself that what other people think is not important. I’ve spent A LOT of time constantly worrying about what everyone thinks of me, whether I look good enough etc. The truth is, their opinion is irrelevant. The only important opinion is the one you have of yourself. If you’re happy with yourself, than that is all that matters.
  2. Speak up.
    This is advice that I need to take for myself more often. I always hide away when I’m feeling low, I don’t let anybody know what is going on in my head. I isolate myself and that’s not good for anyone. Always remember that there will be someone out there willing to help. Even if it’s just a shoulder to cry on.
  3. Figure out who you are as a person.
    This one is definitely easier said than done. I’m still trying to figure out who I am as a person. I’ve been so caught up in the fact that my partner is not around, that I’ve forgotten about the things that I enjoyed before he left. I loved writing. I loved blogging. I was always easily inspired but since he left, the only things I can think about are of a negative nature. I lost myself in him. Don’t get me wrong, I love him immensely, but at some point I need to focus on myself again. Finding out that I was ‘the girl with mental health problems’ was a huge kick to the guts because at first, I believed it. I mainly write about my mental health struggles so for a while there, I believed what was being said about me. But at the end of the day, you are always more than the trauma you have been through. It can be hard to remember that.


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  1. December 13, 2017 / 9:27 pm

    These are some great tips! I have anxiety and these will help me out so much!!

    • jadexoadmin
      December 13, 2017 / 9:29 pm

      Glad you liked them babe!

  2. December 14, 2017 / 2:53 am

    When I saw the title this kind of hit me in the gut. I instantly felt you were speaking about me. I’ve been letting my trauma define me, and I know it’s not healthy. Great post.

    • jadexoadmin
      December 14, 2017 / 2:55 am

      I’m sorry you felt that way but thank you for your feedback!

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